An Open Letter To Kaleem Aftab Of The BBC

Hi, Kaleem,

What were you thinking? No, really. What were you thinking? You misattribute spurious motivations to Gilliam, make a frankly baffling comparison to David Lynch - as though any American story that involves fantasy or surrealism alongside seediness is cast in Blue Velvet's image - and seem to imagine that "the first 20 minutes" portray "a freaky heroin-addicted Jeff Bridges lording over his isolated manor", which, as we both really know isn't what happens in the first 20 minutes at all.

Hope you enjoyed looking at your notepad throughout the film. Next time you are offered a film to review, do the world a favour and pay attention.

Yours,

Angry From Oxford