Wednesday, July 18, 2007

Movie Minesweeper - The Moany Moansweeper Edition

I've read about eight random sides from the last thirty pages or so of Harry Potter 7. Ho hum stuff, really. Big spoiler alert for the rest of this paragraph: ....Severus Snape seems to have become headmaster at Hogwarts while Harry doesn't seem to die but instead grow up and have three kids - but names none of them after his father, leading me to believe... well, that daddy wasn't what he seemed. Or something. Gaps will be filled any day now for those of you who can be bothered. And there are plenty of more thorough spoilers online, I'm sure - but if I knew exactly where, I'd send you to them.

Here's some movie news. Of sorts.

- What appears to be a sales market poster for Righteous Kill is now yours for the looking.

- Is Bambi II really be better than the original? No, of course not. But there's always one clown who likes to be different, isn't there, eh?

- John Leguizamo has been added to the cast of Shyamalan's The Happening. Spoiler alert - again: so, I can tell you that he croaks, but it is a good role, while it lasts.

- Valkyrie has been scheduled for August 8th next year. In the US, anyway. What's more, several sources are now claiming the film is to be called Rubicon, and not Valkyrie, but I hope they're wrong.

- Megan Fox won't be in Half to Death.

- Twitch have a link to some new details (well, sort of) regarding the director's cut DVD of Dark City.

- It's Pagans vs. Homer Simpson.

- Ron Howard is to direct a film of The Emperor's Children, with a screenplay adaptation by Noah Baumbach. I bet that it ends up being absolutely disgustingly induglent, stodgy and self regarding. And maybe so dull that audiences reprise the seat slashing crazes of yore.

Right. That's enough complaining. I have to go to work and complain there instead.

25 comments:

Anonymous said...

Starting off a paragraph with massive HP7 spoilers and only a scant warning may have cost you a loyal reader.

Maybe if you stop complaining about your 'web hits' and start worrying about your content and structure... maybe you'll actually deserve readers.

Harmen said...

Ho Hum stuff Brendon? As in very mediocre or what? And please, i've been able to read over de spoilers up until now, i just want to know if it's really that bad.

williamjutsum said...

Can you put the Harry Potter stuff in inviso-text or something?

Anonymous said...

Great - thanks for the spoilers! Perhaps some inviso-text next time?

Brendon said...

Content and structure? Care to elucidate?

Anonymous said...

I wrote a post that I think was not published or got eaten by the internet, so I'll repeat my point.

Harry potter novel spoilers have nothing to do with movies, and seem an attempt to just get more hits. Also, you could have put some space between the warning and the actual spoiler content or written them in white, which is something that Rich Johnson does often, for example. Maybe you'll get some new hits Brandon, and well , good for you. But not only I will not come back to this website until I finished reading the Harry Potter book, but I just sent a mass email to other people not to come by your site.

Matteo

williamjutsum said...

Got to say it pissed me off a tad too.

I knows it's hugely sad but id like to find out fro myself.

Brendon said...

Of course Harry Potter spoilers are movie related. The most successful film on release at the moment is a direct translation of one such novel. I mean, I wish it weren't the case, but it is.

This site is, and always will be, covered in spoilers. I told you they were there. Just skip over them.

Inviso-text, or whatever, is a chore for some readers too. And can look a bit crap.

But most importantly, is time consuming. And I give this too much of my time as it is.

Friends of Matteo who came anyway... Hello.

Jack said...

Ugh...he said the spoilers were there...I read them, and I'm annoyed, but that's my OWN fault because it was specifically stated that there were "big spoiler"s...

Bill said...

Yeah, I think the needless HP spoilers just cost you another reader here.

(I know that's not much, but whoever created that "OMG WHY ISNT THIS SITE MORE POPULAR?" poll might want to Brendon's spoiler-post as a future option on the poll.)

Harmen said...

Now that we're on the subject Brendon:What do you think about the potter series? Both book and on film.

margolik said...

first off... who gives a shit? like snap being headmaster REALLY ruined something for you? there could be a million different ways the story lead to this, and a million different ways that the story will branch off from this. to be honest your synopsis is just down right confusing and lacking anything of substance, so i don't think of it as much of a spoiler.

hey here's a spoiler, harry potter dies when he stops breathing. wow. there, i ruined the entire series now.

williamjutsum said...

It's Pottergate!

Anonymous said...

IM NEVER GONNA POST HERE AGAIN

Anonymous said...

The Harry Potter spoilers were bad enough. But the random "Happening" spoilers? Honestly, the reason I don't recommend Film Ick is because you don't invisotext spoilers.

Mark said...

SHIT!SHIT!SHIT!SHIT!SHIT!SHIT!SHIT!

Now I'm going to have to avoid this site until Sunday night.

Anonymous said...

Way to be a sly prick there Brendon.

I don't even like Harry Potter and even I think that was bang out of order. You pass judgement like any typical coffee shop intellectual, yet your own output (oh i've seen it on youtube...especially that painfully bland Paperlung video, I don't know why you wasted your time) is pedestrian.

Anonymous said...

sorry, how is it ho-hum? (not sarcastic, just asking)

Anonymous said...

That epilogue didn't reveal anything. My brother read the whole book online (before he gets his reserved copy on Saturday). From what I spoke to him about, Brendan didn't reveal anything crucial.
He was a bit disappointed that the ending didn't really give a satisfying story to life after Hogwarts. It's very vague. I'd like to know what JOB Harry gets after graduating from wizard school. Does he go to a muggle university? What does one use magic for after the teenage years?

Anonymous said...

Here is where all the spoilers are at, unless someone has leaked an elaborate 759 page fake copy of Harry Potter online. It's been a couple years, it might have happened....
http://ytmnd.com/

Mark said...

Looks like you misread that epilogue, anyway. Two of the three kids are named after his parents (James and Lily), the third after Dumbledore and Snape (Albus Severus)

Brendon said...

Mark! No spoiler warning?

I admit that I read the epilogue quickly - I didn't have much time with it.

Did you enjoy the book?

Mark said...

Well, I enjoyed it a lot more than the last two. Thought the last hundred-and-a-few pages were a worthy capper to the series as a whole.

Are spoiler warnings still necessary after it's already been bought by, what, seven per cent of the UK's entire population?

Brendon said...

If a six foot spoiler warning of crimson flame was necessary last week (which it wasn't) then something is still probably required.

I don't mind if you leave spoiler warnings off. I mean, go ahead: spoil anything.

But somebody will complain.

Mark said...

Hedwig explodes! Dobby dies a horrible violent death!